This article by Pamerla Paul really hit home for me. One day, when I was in the 7th grade, three of my best friends suddenly decided they hated me. Actually, one of them decided they hated me and convinced the other two that they should take her side along with anyone else she could persuade. What possible reasons could one 7th grader hate another? Well, looking back I guess it probably was a result of parenting. For instance, the article says that the mother of a mean girl would probably say things like "you don't look nice today." I am almost certain that this girl received this type of criticism. At the time, however, I was told all sorts of ridiculous reasons for them not liking me such as my shorts were too short (not true), I was a slut (even though I had a boyfriend?) and that I jumped from friend to friend (this really made no sense to me and was not true). One day, this girl got on the bus and pulled out a list of things about me that she did not like. Most 7th graders are pretty insecure and want to fit in so to sit there and listen to a number of things that I now had to be insecure about in addition to whatever I already was insecure about was really hurtful.
It was a constant struggle to put up with the hatred coming from these girls because they were everywhere, in my classes, on my sports teams, on my bus, at any parties I was invited to, just everywhere. Even when I was at home I wasn't free from it. One day, they called me and pretended to want to be friends again just to further torture me and rub it in my face that they didn't like me. In order to deal with the harrassment I cried a lot and even kept a journal to let out my anger and sadness.
This issue of young girls treating each other in this awful way is a serious issue, in my opinion. The effects are long lasting which I can attest to. I am constantly afraid that my friends do not like me or are going to turn on me. Because of this I often do not allow myself to get close to others. I often do not speak up about my feelings because I do not want to give someone a reason not to like me. It may seem ridiculous to feel these things due to something from so long ago but it truly was scarring to me. I guess I don't know for sure that I am like this because of these past events but I think it has certainly contributed to it.
I think that there are a few things that could be done in order to help this problem. Perhaps the topic of bullying could be addressed in school at an earlier age. Like the article said, children are maturing sooner which is increasing this behavior at an earlier age therefore it should be addressed sooner. Since parents are a part of the problem, somehow addressing them could help fix the problem. However, I cannot think of a good way in which this could be done. Maybe parents of students in elementary school could be required to recieve instructions on how to prevent and deal with bullying. Another way that could possibly lessen the problem would be to provide television that does not have socially aggressive characters which was thought to be a problem in the article.
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