While writing my essay about the article "She's Got to Be a Macho Girl" by Kuczynski, I found myself wanting to say some things about the article that I could not stick into my paper so I figured I would just blog about it. First of all to summarize, the article is about how girls are becoming more aggressive at initiating relations with the opposite sex. It is thought that they have achieved this power from watching powerful women in the media and from feminist ideas that are taught to them at a young age.
This article does not convince me that this is occurring on a large scale because it was based on anecdotal information from what I believe to be a biased group. I believe it to be biased because it consisted of psychologists and counselors who generally only see children with some sort of problem. These children that they are seeing could be coming to them because they are dealing with issues related to sex whereas those who are not having sex might not be as aggressive towards boys. Since they are not having sex they might not need to go see them. This might be a stretch but nonetheless, I feel the research could be done in a better manner. This being said, I do not know that the article is even trying to indicate that this is occurring on a large scale but since I do not really feel that it is, I just wanted to point it out.
Furthermore, the article gives a positive and negative analysis of this situation. It is positive because girls are becoming more equal to boys in the dating world, but they are also becoming less sensitive and putting themselves in jeopardy. Is it really worth it for girls to take advantage of their sexuality in order to be "equal" to guys? Honestly, I felt really bad for the girls being discussed in the article and to me they did not seem empowered at all. The article says that they approach men in a sexualized manner because they think "this is all I have to offer" and that they are learning how to act from the predatory actions of women in the media. Also according to the article, girls do not associate love with sex anymore so that they will not get hurt. These different pieces from the article paint a very sad picture of young girls to me.
The article points out positives as well saying that girls are empowered, they will question everything, and they have more control in relationships. Are these positives worth the negatives? That is a matter of opinion. I think in order to lessen the negatives without losing the positives girls need to be taught empowerment and aggressiveness not by sexualized figures but by strong women who do not need to use sex to get what they want. Girls need positive figures in their life and in the media. The media really needs to change in order to give young girls the right idea about being strong women and if the media is not going to change, parents need to make sure that their children know that the media is corrupt. This, of course, is a hard task but parents need to make an effort or else young girls will continue to feel that they need to sexualize themselves in order to be on an equal playing field with their counterparts.
In addition to the negatives listed above, girls are also putting themselves in greater danger of getting pregnant or contracting STIs. Girls become so focused on being sexy and trying to please guys that they forget that there are serious consequences for their actions. This point brings up the question of are young kids receiving appropriate sex education? In the one case in the article, a girl that was acting like a "vixen" ended up getting pregnant and contracting an STI. She had not been taught about her body and the value of sex. Comprehensive sex education is vital in making sure girls know these things so that cases like these can be prevented.
Monday, December 13, 2010
Honour Killings: Saved from India's caste system by the Love Commandos
In this article, it talks about how men and women that fall in love are forbidden to get married due to the tradition of arranged marriage. It is not acceptable for someone to marry someone of a lower caste. A specific couple, Aarti and Sanjay, wanted nothing more than to be together, but Aarti's family would not allow her to marry this "lowly" boy. Because of her disobedience, Aarti was beaten by her family and her neighbors and was sold by her family 3 times! Luckily, a group called the Love Commandos, which consists of volunteers, provided the lovers with safety. Even though the two are technically married, they are still in danger and are under a sentence of death. The Love Commandos group formed after many brutal killings took place. They value love and want to protect others that do as well, even with their minimal funding and even if it means putting their life in danger.
Those who defend arranged marriages argue that people who fall in love before marriage and then get married will end up falling out of love. Whereas, those who get married without first being in love will then fall in love later. So, parents think they are helping their children by forcing them to marry a certain person. So really they just are trying to do what is best for their kids, right? If that is the case, then why are they beating their child? Even if she is disobeying their wishes, that does not mean that they should be allowed to physically harm her. It seems pretty hypocritical to me to act as if you are just trying to give them a good life while at the same time causing them tremendous pain.
This article reminds me of a movie called the Wedding Planner. Jennifer Lopez's family continually tries to influence her into marrying this guy. She is not interested because she is not in love with him. When she gets angry with her father he confesses that his marriage to her mother was arranged and they were very unhappy about it at first. Over time, they grew to love each other and he wanted the same for his daughter. Jennifer Lopez almost goes against what her heart is telling her to do (marry a different guy) but realizes it is not for her. Just because it worked out for her parents does not mean that it would work out for her as well. Personally, I think that those in India that believe in arranged marriages need to realize that arranged marriages can work or they can fail and the same goes for marriages that are not arranged. By not letting their children decide for themselves they are only pushing them away and possibly losing them as a part of their life, such as in the case of Aarti.
Those who defend arranged marriages argue that people who fall in love before marriage and then get married will end up falling out of love. Whereas, those who get married without first being in love will then fall in love later. So, parents think they are helping their children by forcing them to marry a certain person. So really they just are trying to do what is best for their kids, right? If that is the case, then why are they beating their child? Even if she is disobeying their wishes, that does not mean that they should be allowed to physically harm her. It seems pretty hypocritical to me to act as if you are just trying to give them a good life while at the same time causing them tremendous pain.
This article reminds me of a movie called the Wedding Planner. Jennifer Lopez's family continually tries to influence her into marrying this guy. She is not interested because she is not in love with him. When she gets angry with her father he confesses that his marriage to her mother was arranged and they were very unhappy about it at first. Over time, they grew to love each other and he wanted the same for his daughter. Jennifer Lopez almost goes against what her heart is telling her to do (marry a different guy) but realizes it is not for her. Just because it worked out for her parents does not mean that it would work out for her as well. Personally, I think that those in India that believe in arranged marriages need to realize that arranged marriages can work or they can fail and the same goes for marriages that are not arranged. By not letting their children decide for themselves they are only pushing them away and possibly losing them as a part of their life, such as in the case of Aarti.
Friday, December 10, 2010
Privileges
While I was writing my blog about transgender, I had mentioned that I was wondering what other privileges I have that I am not aware of. I proceeded to get into the topic a little too much so I decided I should just write another blog about it. One privilege that I thought about that I have but am unaware of is being right handed. The majority of people are right-handed so pretty much everything is designed around being right-handed. The first thing I thought of was the sport I play, field hockey. Field hockey sticks are designed for right-handed people and left-handed people have to use the same sticks. At least in baseball they have left-handed gloves as well but for my sport there is simply nothing left-handers can do except use the same sticks as right-handers. This is just a small example but there are so many more. I actually did a little research and read something that summed up some of these right-handed privileges that we often do not think about (unless you are left-handed of course).
In "The Right Hand of Privilege," Steven Jones, Ph.D. writes:
So now that I have become aware of some of these disadvantages I face, am I really any better off? Maybe I was better off not knowing and living in bliss. Actually though, I think I am better off being aware because I was starting to feel bad for having so many privileges. It is no ones fault that they are born with privileges but it is good to be aware of them and considerate of those who are disadvantaged. Ideally, being aware will help us slowly even out the playing field in these different areas. Whether that is realistic though, I am not sure.
In "The Right Hand of Privilege," Steven Jones, Ph.D. writes:
We shake with our right hands. We pledge with our right hand. We salute with our right hand. We take legal and governmental oaths with our right hand. School desks are set up for right-handed people. Most baseball mitts are designed for right-handed people. When computers first came out, the mouse was set up on the right-hand side. Cars are set up for right-handed people to drive comfortably. Notebooks are designed for right-handed people to write comfortably. Guns are designed for right-handers to shoot. Appliances open to the right, making it easy for right-handers to open. Punch ladles are designed for right-handed people. Most coffee mugs are designed for right-handed people to pick up and see the picture or words. If a left-handed person picks up the same mug, there is nothing there to see! I recently went into a store called the Left-handed store in San Diego, Ca. When was the last time you walked into your local Wal-Mart, Target, or departmental store and thought about the fact that you were in a right-handed store?I am sure the list could go on for a while but he definitely makes his point. This is another privilege I have that I am going to be aware of. Of course, there really is not anything I can do because I am not in charge of designing anything. I have to wonder if left-handed people recognize that they are disadvantaged. I think that they most likely do but at the same time, men are privileged over women yet I often do not think about their privileges. This is probably because a lot of the privileges of men are things related to careers and when they are a part of a family. Some of the privileges of men that affect me now though include men having less pressure to be thin, their emotions will not be blamed on "that time of the month," grooming costs are lower, and clothes are less expensive and usually are more likely to fit properly. I had to think a while though to come up with these because it is not something that affects me, at least consciously, on a day to day basis.
So now that I have become aware of some of these disadvantages I face, am I really any better off? Maybe I was better off not knowing and living in bliss. Actually though, I think I am better off being aware because I was starting to feel bad for having so many privileges. It is no ones fault that they are born with privileges but it is good to be aware of them and considerate of those who are disadvantaged. Ideally, being aware will help us slowly even out the playing field in these different areas. Whether that is realistic though, I am not sure.
Transgender
Prior to this presentation I did not know a lot about transgender. I now know that transgender means that an individual has a difference between their sex and gender meaning that their biological sex does not match up with their socially perceived set of characteristics. I never realized how much transgender people have to go through on a daily basis. These are things that cisgendered people, like myself, take for granted. There is a long list of privileges that cisgendered people have that we are unaware of; for instance, i do not have to worry about not being able to use a public restroom, being addressed with the wrong pronouns, or be afraid to go to the doctor in fear of discovery. In a previous blog I wrote about privileges I have because I am white and little did I know that I also have another list full of privileges for being cisgendered. This make me wonder about how many other ways I am unknowingly privileged.
During the presentation we explored different models of gender. One model is set up in a way that puts male and female in opposition to one another. Therefore, you can be masculine, feminine, or somewhere in between. This model does not work because it does not account for people that are high in masculine and feminine traits. Another model has the two as separate spectras which fixes the problem of the first model. This model, however, is still rather simple and binary. A new idea for a model accounted for attribution, identity, and expression. In this model, each category consists of 5 spaces that can be filled in as masculine, feminine, or neutral. Attribution describes what others view you as, identity is how you feel, and expression is how you choose to express your gender. Although this model allows for a very fluid explanation of gender, it might be too fluid. The model could be constantly changing in multiple aspects of a person's life. However, one way to use it is to observe patterns. I am not too sure about the attribution category though. If someone attributes the wrong gender to me and tells me, then that could hurt my feelings. I am not sure that this would necessarily change my identity and maybe not even my expression. Furthermore, if someone attributes me the wrong gender and I do not know about it, then it does not affect me at all.
I particularly enjoyed the part of the presentation in which a guest speaker, Andy, came in to talk to us. I have seen Andy around campus and prior to earlier this year I did not know that she was transgendered. Even when I learned that a couple weeks ago, I did not know what that entailed. A lot of people instantly assume Andy is a male that wears skirts and do not care to learn the truth. I am so glad that now I have an understanding of transgender because I want to be respectful of other people and their feelings. However, I also do not want to assume someone is transgendered by looking at them because that could be disrespectful as well. I guess the only way to be fair is to not assume anything at all and actually get to know people. This, however, I know would be extremely difficult to do. It is unreasonable to ask every person you meet about their gender considering a majority of people are cisgendered. So, although I cannot stop assuming gender all together, I am more aware and can be more respectful.
During the presentation we explored different models of gender. One model is set up in a way that puts male and female in opposition to one another. Therefore, you can be masculine, feminine, or somewhere in between. This model does not work because it does not account for people that are high in masculine and feminine traits. Another model has the two as separate spectras which fixes the problem of the first model. This model, however, is still rather simple and binary. A new idea for a model accounted for attribution, identity, and expression. In this model, each category consists of 5 spaces that can be filled in as masculine, feminine, or neutral. Attribution describes what others view you as, identity is how you feel, and expression is how you choose to express your gender. Although this model allows for a very fluid explanation of gender, it might be too fluid. The model could be constantly changing in multiple aspects of a person's life. However, one way to use it is to observe patterns. I am not too sure about the attribution category though. If someone attributes the wrong gender to me and tells me, then that could hurt my feelings. I am not sure that this would necessarily change my identity and maybe not even my expression. Furthermore, if someone attributes me the wrong gender and I do not know about it, then it does not affect me at all.
I particularly enjoyed the part of the presentation in which a guest speaker, Andy, came in to talk to us. I have seen Andy around campus and prior to earlier this year I did not know that she was transgendered. Even when I learned that a couple weeks ago, I did not know what that entailed. A lot of people instantly assume Andy is a male that wears skirts and do not care to learn the truth. I am so glad that now I have an understanding of transgender because I want to be respectful of other people and their feelings. However, I also do not want to assume someone is transgendered by looking at them because that could be disrespectful as well. I guess the only way to be fair is to not assume anything at all and actually get to know people. This, however, I know would be extremely difficult to do. It is unreasonable to ask every person you meet about their gender considering a majority of people are cisgendered. So, although I cannot stop assuming gender all together, I am more aware and can be more respectful.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Contested Spaces
In the three poems by Wong, Rushin, and Carrillo the authors expresses their anger and/or resentment towards whites that comes from their experiences of being a minority. Wong wished she was white instead of dark throughout her whole life and constantly strived to fit into that mold. Rushin is tired of being the only black friend of her group and she explains all the ways that others rely on her for this reason. Carrillo writes about how "white sisters" just do not understand what it is really like to be dark skinned and about their misconceptions. They may have pictures of a black woman but they do not actually have a black friend.
Macintosh's article helps explain the anger that Carrillo shows toward white men and women. White people have a privilege that comes along with being white but they do not realize this. Because they do not recognize that they have an advantage over minorities, minorities become resentful. Macintosh says that if someone is privileged but does not know that they are then they will not be able to work at ending it. Personally, I know their are times when I forget how privileged I am that I am white but their are times that I recognize it. Even when I do recognize it though, I feel as if there is nothing I can do to help fix it. The best that I think that I can do is to try to maintain awareness and to not use my privilege to further disadvantage those that are not privileged.
The article by Macintosh also relates to the poem by Rushin. It seems to me that the white friends of this black individual rely on her to be their link to the black world and make them feel better about themselves because they have a black friend. Even though they are priviliged, by having a black friend they seem to be trying to show that they are equal and not privileged. By having one black friend they are not proving anything about equality. Actually, they are just causing aggrevation to their black friend because of their inability to see that they truly are privileged.
Wong's poem can also be analyzed with the help of Macintosh's article. Wong recognizes the privileges of white people and longs to gain such advantages. Instead of expressing anger, Wong expresses her enviousness of whites. It is a shame that she must feel this way because she even says some things that she was proud of about herself when she was young, like her intelligence. Unfortunately, others have put ideas in her head that being Chinese is not as good as being white. It is true that whites have privileges but minorities should be happy with their selves just the way they are. However, I know this is easier said than done due to the world we live in.
Macintosh's article helps explain the anger that Carrillo shows toward white men and women. White people have a privilege that comes along with being white but they do not realize this. Because they do not recognize that they have an advantage over minorities, minorities become resentful. Macintosh says that if someone is privileged but does not know that they are then they will not be able to work at ending it. Personally, I know their are times when I forget how privileged I am that I am white but their are times that I recognize it. Even when I do recognize it though, I feel as if there is nothing I can do to help fix it. The best that I think that I can do is to try to maintain awareness and to not use my privilege to further disadvantage those that are not privileged.
The article by Macintosh also relates to the poem by Rushin. It seems to me that the white friends of this black individual rely on her to be their link to the black world and make them feel better about themselves because they have a black friend. Even though they are priviliged, by having a black friend they seem to be trying to show that they are equal and not privileged. By having one black friend they are not proving anything about equality. Actually, they are just causing aggrevation to their black friend because of their inability to see that they truly are privileged.
Wong's poem can also be analyzed with the help of Macintosh's article. Wong recognizes the privileges of white people and longs to gain such advantages. Instead of expressing anger, Wong expresses her enviousness of whites. It is a shame that she must feel this way because she even says some things that she was proud of about herself when she was young, like her intelligence. Unfortunately, others have put ideas in her head that being Chinese is not as good as being white. It is true that whites have privileges but minorities should be happy with their selves just the way they are. However, I know this is easier said than done due to the world we live in.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Reaction to Articles for Thursday Presentation
My reaction to the first article, ABC Links American Christans to Anti-Gay Death Penalty in Uganda, is mostly just shocked. The American Pastor with extreme views, Scott Lively, and the Ugandan Pastor Martin Ssempa said some very awful things about homosexuals. Feelings against homosexuals in Uganda are so strong that the potential law could result in the death penalty for some. It is crazy how influential a group of Americans can be on another country. As a country we need to be careful about the messages we are sending to others. I hope that these pastors did not intend for something so extreme to come from what they said and that being the case I hope they will be more careful about what they are portraying to other countries.
In the next article, Ugly Betty is Gone. Now Where's the Latina TV?, they talked about the scarcity of Latina actresses. I do agree with the article that it must be hard for Latinas to find roles in TV but I have to wonder what the difference is in a ratio form because I would think that there are probably a lot less Latinas than Caucasians trying to break into the industry. I would like to know the percent of each, whites and Latinas, that are trying to achieve roles and do or do not succeed.
The third article about gender role perceptions the author talks about the stereotypes that Asian-American women must face. They are thought to be either captive prostitutes, submissive, fragile China dolls, sex pots, or housekeepers. Asian-Americans respond to the societal stereotypes that are put on them by internalizing them which causes them to be part of their attitude and behavior. The gender roles are transmitted through family and other aspects of socialization. In all, gender role perceptions and intergenerational differences are determined by an interaction of macro, micro, and developmental factors. I knew that the gender roles of women were affected in these ways but I had not really considered it through the aspect of race. The lack of diversity of portrayal of Asian-American women in the media negatively affects them because they are forced to take on these stereotypical roles.
In the next article, Ugly Betty is Gone. Now Where's the Latina TV?, they talked about the scarcity of Latina actresses. I do agree with the article that it must be hard for Latinas to find roles in TV but I have to wonder what the difference is in a ratio form because I would think that there are probably a lot less Latinas than Caucasians trying to break into the industry. I would like to know the percent of each, whites and Latinas, that are trying to achieve roles and do or do not succeed.
The third article about gender role perceptions the author talks about the stereotypes that Asian-American women must face. They are thought to be either captive prostitutes, submissive, fragile China dolls, sex pots, or housekeepers. Asian-Americans respond to the societal stereotypes that are put on them by internalizing them which causes them to be part of their attitude and behavior. The gender roles are transmitted through family and other aspects of socialization. In all, gender role perceptions and intergenerational differences are determined by an interaction of macro, micro, and developmental factors. I knew that the gender roles of women were affected in these ways but I had not really considered it through the aspect of race. The lack of diversity of portrayal of Asian-American women in the media negatively affects them because they are forced to take on these stereotypical roles.
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